ONE cannot over emphasize the need for money in running a home. Money will answer to house rent, filling your kitchen with variety of foodstuff, clothing at your level for your dignifying appearance, and more.

Financial meltdown will have no harsh effect on you if you fear God in your relationship with your wife and children; for you shall enjoy favour of God as you succeed in your endeavours.

Your charity must begin from your home. The Word of God says you will eat the fruit of your labour, blessings and prosperity will be yours [Psalms 128:2]. That means, for everything you do, there is a reward.

Why then are many in lack, you ask. In some marriages, the principle of two becoming one does not extend to mutual respect for one another. If it is on monetary matter, they become two. Some men are so stingy they do not relate with their wives on monetary matters. That is a no-go area.

A man who finds it difficult to reveal his financial status to his wife is in a wrong relationship. Or a wife who thinks her husband should provide for everything, at all times without her contributing anything sometimes, is wicked. Husband and wife should be able to relate joyfully without hidden secrets, financially. That is when they are naked and not ashamed.

I had the opportunity to listen to a woman who has been in marriage for about twelve years talking. She said there is no way she could relate with her husband monetarily. She said her husband taught her all she decided to do and the way she paddled her canoe as far as marital relationship with money was concerned.

I cut in to say but you are to do things together as husband and wife; that there should be unity of mind and purpose for peaceful coexistence.

Creating an enabling environment for progress in a home starts with mutual respect and trust for one another. The woman cut in to ask: if you marry a man who, through his actions, does not want you to progress; who does not know how to help you, who does not even encourage you to improve your life, how do you relate with such man?

I’m talking of a man who starts to complain and find faults each time you want to do something that could add value to your life, how do you handle that?

Looking at this woman, she is not the loud type but she is comfortable. I now enquired whether her husband had offended her, which she could not forgive; even after four children. She told me she loves her husband but the two of them cannot relate without rancor if money is involved.

According to her, she is relating with her husband the way they could coexist. She said her husband does not know whether you need money for your personal upkeep or not. Clothing his wife and children does not come easy for him. He is stingy, she says, a tight fisted man of the worst order.

The worst of it all is that he will take money from you with a promise to pay back but he will never keep his promise. When you ask, he feels offended. He beats me up on three occasions as a result of an argument over money.

I was blamed at the end and I made up my mind never again to allow such business transaction in our marriage. He prefers to love me without his money. And I am coping fine.

Her husband is a businessman while she is a salary earner working with an examination body. She concluded: “I laid my situation bare to God in prayer and God rained His favour on me. I shall never cheat on him. I love him and my children. His fault is money. He’s just naturally stingy.”

When you treat money as your master, it rules over you. Just like this woman, I’ve heard people complain about their husbands being stingy.

I do wonder if the men involved in this stingy game realize the harm they are bringing on their marital well-being. God’s Word says what He has joined together, let nothing put asunder. But these men are allowing money, which is supposed to be a servant in homes if the duo can unite and do things in love and harmony, to put a wedge between them and their spouse. This is not good. One will chase one thousand while two shall chase and overcome ten thousand. The difference is clear and enormous.

It takes a big heart to borrow from your wife but you should be man enough to pay back without insult, humiliation or beating. It is degrading.

The Word of God says owe no man [Romans 13:8]. That ought to include your wife. The Word also says you shall lend to nations, you shall not borrow. The moment you are at the mercy of your wife, financially, it is time to check your attitude towards your marital vow. For you shall be the head and not the tail, says the Word of God.

Your wife is a helper, not a burden bearer. The book of wisdom states that: If a man pays back evil for good, evil will never leave his house [Proverbs 17:13]. Do not invite evil to your house. Also, Psalms 37:21 says: “The wicked borrow and do not repay, but the righteous give generously.”

It is not right to be wicked to yourself. It is those who fear God that shall enjoy blessings and prosperity in their houses. Enduring financial breakthrough is for the righteous not for the wicked.

Amend your ways. Repent and ask for forgiveness so that you can have financial breakthrough with peace of mind.