THE odds many are facing today in their matrimony are as a result of ignorance. Ignorance is not an excuse for you not to pay penalty for your error. Nature is no respecter of man or woman. Whatever you do, the consequence will wait for you. Lack of self-control is another reason for the protracted secret heart ache of many today.

A man/woman who lacks self-control can be likened to a city without a gate. Any demon or trouble can crawl in to wreck havoc.

The shame and rejection caused by either ignorance or lack of self-control or the duo, is what those innocent children, teenagers and youths are paying for. As a child you do not need to be bitter and throw away you dignity.

TO THE CHILDREN: Being born out of wedlock is not a disease or an infirmity which you could cure or be healed of. An error has been committed. And you happen to be the reward/result of the error. A child who has no privilege of staying with his parents as a result of this type of error committed against him/her should not take it against himself.

You are a child of a well structural destiny if only you can be optimistic about your life. The truth is that you have no contribution or choice to make as far as who your parents are. This is the more reason you should not be too harsh on yourself or anybody. You have done nothing wrong but a victim of circumstance by birth. This situation could be amended in your favour if you do not engage yourself in blaming your parents but rather being positive about your situation and show love so that the glorious “You” may emerge. God has a great design for you which no one can disrupt except you.

Jesus Christ was born by a virgin Mary, Joseph, his earthly father put up with him and the mother. Jesus also grew with his brothers in unity and He, Jesus focused on his assignment. If only our teenagers and youths who have this stigma could overcome it and discover their purpose and live for it, they shall be celebrated as we are celebrating Jesus the Christ today.

It will be wrong of you to want to fight your mother’s battle or to be involved in fighting for your mother’s right in your father’s house by confronting or going against your step-mother. That is zeal without knowledge and you will definitely miss your step or way. You do not have all the facts; such battle could consume you as your mother has been consumed already. Do not allow your parents folly to ruin your own life.

Recalling my last edition story, the first woman and her son disrupted the peace Foluke had come with to unite the family. The woman and her son engaged themselves in another round of folly and they all lost out “big”. As a child, it is better to be neutral so as to attain your enthronement into a life of distinction God has prepared for you.

STEP INTO YOUR VICTORY: Take your life as it is, discover a way to add value to your life just as Jephthah did when he was rejected by his brothers (Judges 11 & 12). Endure the shame, embrace humility. Respect your step-mother. She is not your enemy but an anchor to link you to your life of distinction as well as to restore your lost dignity and flourishing future.

Learn from your parents’ mistake so that you do not fall into the temptation that brought you into this uncomfortable situation.

If your mother or anybody is talking you into going against your father’s house, other children or your step-mother, it is that such person, even your mother, that is pushing you into fighting the battle she could not confront.

For every child who humbles himself despite the victimization, he ends up being the light and savior of his people. And that is who you shall be in Jesus Christ’s name. Amen.

In my next column, I shall be looking at the step-mothers’ angle/side. It is a difficult task. But heaven knows you could; that is why He has brought you to marry your husband with love child(ren).

Phillipians 4:13, You can do all things through Jesus Christ who has become your strength. He has made a way of escape from every destruction or evil for you to succeed in the assignment. 1 Corinthians 10: 13. Just as He did for me.

Jesus reigns.